Care less. Do more.

“No man is an island.” I often use this quote to remind myself or others that we are all connected and that everything we do has a cause and effect. But today, I considered seeing myself as an island, just for a moment, and found a new regard for my own beliefs and a “who cares” attitude about other’s perceptions of me. This is not my way of condoning or endorsing selfish or reckless decisions, but instead an opening to look at life from a narrow, inner focus so we can act from our own center.

Just think for a minute if you could strip away all the programming of what “should be”. If we could stop thinking about what our parents want for us, what our friends want for us, what we think we should be doing on a Saturday night, what we think we should be doing in our careers, what our bank accounts should look like, what our bodies should look like – what we realize is that we are in a constant need of projecting an image of ourselves. Maybe our fear isn’t necessarily that we aren’t good enough, its that we fear others won’t think we are.

Can you say with certainty that you love someone, something, or yourself – even if others don’t love that person, that thing, or you? Could you be okay with standing alone with your convictions? Do you need others to support your interests? Do you need others to validate how you live your life?

Two activities to help increase your connection to your center:

  1. Turn off your music. Next time you are driving, try being in complete silence. Listen to your thoughts. See how many times other’s points of view cross your mind. Ask yourself, “if I were living on an island, all by myself, how would my thoughts, feelings, and actions change?”
  2. Who do you love? Think about your role model. Why are they so worthy of your admiration? Is it because they live life fearlessly? Taking chances, being themselves, going against the grain? If you respect them for being unapoligetically themselves, can it be okay for you to do the same with your life?

Seeking praise and recognition from others is human, normal, and absolutely NOT wrong. Hold on to the desire to be a social being who is respected by the people in your life, please! But also see if you can make your inner voice even louder and more honest – because it could lead to a more authentic human experience and unwavering happiness.

“Don’t worry about the people who aren’t happy for you. They probably aren’t happy for themselves either.”



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